bE wEll

Saying the words ‘Be Well’ to you seemed so sad… so tears welled up.

I couldn’t help, but let it go… all the way down to my chin.

I wished you to be well, truth is I wish it would be with me.

But that would be selfish of me.

I already know. I already know.

Isn’t that why I let you go ?

I didn’t want you to sacrifice things for me, be hurt for me, or even pitying me…

I tried to be strong through all of it…

But I was wrong… I was wrong…

I’m sorry.

I didn’t know it would hurt this bad. I tried to be strong.

But I crumbled, cried, crashed… and burned…

0o0o0o0o0o

Tears… fell, streamed, never ending…

…1 drop 2 drops 3 drops 4 drops 5 drops…

I wonder if what the sky was feeling as I cried.

.It responded to me quickly.

…1 drop 2 drops 3 drops 4 drops 5 drops…

It rained heavily, letting no piece of earth laid dry of suffocation.

It watered the hurt pieces with that strong, soothing wind.

Like the memories of you,

It blew past me happily, leaving me the feeling of content…

But never turning back.

0o0o0o0o0o0

I hated myself.

I hated the fact that while I tried to win you over,

I annoyed you, I took your time, I made you choose, I sent sadness to your heart.

I hated it.

It made my heart hurt as it made yours.

I never wanted to interfere.

I vowed to myself it was never going to be same like what I did in the past.

…but I was wrong…

.again.

Maybe that was why you never turned back…

Why you never glanced at my way for even a second…

I never blamed you. I’m still not blaming you.

I don’t know if it’s because

I’m too much for anyone to handle...

Or I’m not enough for anyone’s standard…

because

No matter how much I tell you I love you,

It wouldn’t work.

0o0o0o0o0o0

I was wrong.

Maybe it really is the best for the both of us if

I just say ‘Be well’…

Turn around, and walk away…

But I don’t want to guess anything.

The words ‘maybe’ is just too much for me, too much for me to say…

It gives me hope of something different than what’s already happening.

And when hopes dawn in my heart,

I know the wishing star would rain on me in an instance.

I’m too scared to wish for anything…

Because the last time I wished for something…

It passed by me and disappeared, like the wind...

And do you know what I wished for ?

I wished for a Big, Warm, Unending Love…

I got you, instead.

So it turned out,

My wish did come true… didn’t it ?

Be Well, B.